I just got back from my group. It was good.
We all had something, which is definitely productive. I’ll get to my stuff in a minute.
-Other Guy’s outline. Lots of potential, but needs a ton of work. He seems to keep missing basic points of structure, including establishing who the hero of his story is. There are lots of subplots put into play, but it gets confusing trying to keep track of them all. As he said, it all makes sense to him in his mind. But other people need to have it make sense on the page. And without that, it doesn’t work.
It was easy to see the disspointment on his face, but he has a habit of rushing through outlines without thoroughly developing them (in my opinion) and wanting to get right to actual pages. Which is why when he gets our feedback, he starts over. Repeat ad infinitum.
Our advice was to put it away for two weeks, then approach it with things a bit more…thought-out. We’ll see.
-Sole Female had more pages of her script. Nice development, but there is so much in there that can be cut out, or at least rewritten and much, much shorter. I was wincing on the inside when I saw how many spelling errors there were. Don’t get me wrong – she’s got a great idea and is still developing it. But it would be nice to see her not worry so much about minute details and focus more on having fun with it.
Again, we’ll see. I made some suggestions about tightening things up and how to get to the final scene right away.
-My stuff. I made some slight changes to Act One, printed it out and brought it as my contribution. I read through it and got several actual chuckles/laughs from certain parts. That was VERY encouraging. Other Guy had some helpful suggestions on how to better establish a supporting character’s backstory – something I’ve been internally wrestling with since last week – so that was good. They also thought it flowed well, seemed very organic and did a good job of setting things up. This was all followed by “So where’s Act Two?”
Well, first I make changes/edits to Act One. THEN I move on to Act Two. We meet again in 3 weeks, so I’m hoping to have that ready by then.
I’m back in the traffic studio tomorrow, so that means more of SAVE THE CAT and the aformentioned Act One edits.
Getting rumblings that this thing is actually starting to take shape.